Man with a Pan: Fatherhood and Cooking Q&A with John Donohue

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A: Yes, happy to provide. Thanks to you.

Five Tips for Dads who Cook and a Recipe

1) Keep a shopping list handy in the kitchen. One of the fathers I interviewed for Man with a Pan is a former bartender in New Orleans. He borrowed a trick from his old job, and put a clipboard in his kitchen; every few nights he takes inventory and checks off what he needs. He used to run out of orange juice, but not anymore.

2) Keep a stocked larder with the following goods, most of which are imperishable and the rest of which tend to last a long time: dried pasta, capers, anchovies, canned peeled plum tomatoes, black olives and garlic. This way you can make a puttanesca sauce at a moment’s notice. Start the water for the pasta before you make the sauce, and you’ll have dinner on the table by the time the pasta is cooked.

3) Clean as you cook. A messy kitchen is one that’s impossible to think and work in. You are not trying to impress anyone with your cooking, you are just trying to get dinner on the table. And you don’t want to make extra work for your spouse; if she is doing the dishes and you create a mountain of them, it tends to negate the good will you might have created by cooking in the first place.

4) Use your freezer. There are many things you can make in advance in large quantities when you have free time that can be frozen in serving-size containers and defrosted on a weeknight. If you start the cooking when you walk in the door, dinner will be ready practically by the time you get your shoes off.

5) Don’t sweat it if your children won’t eat something. Offer them a choice of one or two things (don’t fall into the trap of becoming a short-order cook) and if they don’t want either, let them go hungry. They won’t starve.

Recipe: Puttanesca Sauce

This is one of the oldest recipes in the world, if its association with the world’s oldest profession is to be believed. Reputedly developed by prostitutes, it has the advantage of being quick and, if you stock your larder correctly, almost always easy to make with what’s on hand at home.

1 28 oz. can peeled plum tomatoes, crushed (or hit with an immersion blender, which is something every home cook should have, and is very fast)
4 or more cloves of garlic, peeled and smashed
3 anchovy fillets
1 chili pepper (or a shake of crushed red pepper); optional
1 tablespoon capers
12 or so black olives, pitted and sliced
Herbs such as basil or oregano, to taste; also optional

Heat some olive oil in a heavy-bottomed pan.

Add the garlic and anchovies and chili pepper. Saute until garlic is soft and the anchovies have dissolved, then add tomatoes and reduce. (Control the spiciness of the sauce by how long you leave the pepper in it — the longer it stays, the hotter it will be).

When the sauce thickens (in about 15 minutes), add capers and olives and any herbs.

Serve over the pasta of your choice.

Nathan Thornburgh is a contributing writer at TIME. He co-founded the parenting blog DadWagon.com in 2009 to help explore the many ways he may be damaging his kids — Dalia, 4, and Nico, 2.

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